Thursday, July 5, 2012

Why

I said a while back one day I would write about why I am taking on this challenge.  Today I need to do that.  To remind myself, to encourage others...to...I don't know.  Just put it out there, my heart is heavy today.  I am doing this because I hate cancer.  I am doing it because I fear losing people I love to cancer before I am ready to say good-bye.  I am doing it for people who wish they still had the choice of running.  I am doing it to offer a symbolic hug to people I don't know who are going through the turmoil of cancer. 

There are benefits I am receiving from training for this half marathon.  I am losing weight, getting more toned, spending quality time with my husband and son and enjoying the outdoors.  I fully admit I benefit from this personally.  However, every single time I step out our door and hit the trail I think of, and pray, for those I know personally or via others who are dealing with the everyday cycle of cancer.  (I hate to even type that word.)  I know me running isn't going to cure cancer.  I do hope my prayers while I run help people and I hope that any money I raise for St. Jude during this training will help fund a cure for cancer and help fund families who need this hospital.  I also pray our family never needs it.  I almost feel guilty putting that out for people to read, but I do pray it. 

During the last few weeks my thoughts and prayers during our runs have focused on two local familes.  The Erwins and the Krulls.  The Erwins might very well lose their son to cancer today.  He is only 15.  Thr Krulls have been on roller coaster of ups and downs for the last two weeks with their daughter Lucy, only 6, and as of the last couple of days are going on a down slope again.  Both of these families are showing amazing courage and faith in God.  I don't know how they do it, but I inspired by it and thankful they have this strength and faith in them.  You can read more about them here:

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/treyerwin

http://erikandkatekrull.blogspot.com/

I am running on a team that is in memory of one of the strongest young men I have ever had the blessing of knowing, Nick Brumfield.  He lost his worldly battle with cancer, but won victory with the Lord last fall.  His family's strenght made everyone they touched stronger.  I still pray for them in my runs.  I know they are strong, but it has to be hard to be strong everyday. 

The last person, but certainly not the least, I consistently think about when I run is my sweet, cousin, Michael Lindsey.  He is cancer free.  The only time I don't mind saying/typing the word cancer is when it is followed by free.  He is a survivor.  I cry everytime I think about that, years later, but I was so scared he wouldn't be and so thankful he is.  I don't tell him enough how proud I am of him for making it through that time and I don't tell his family how proud I am of them enough either, but I am making an internal promise to start doing that more. 

Today I am going to end this post and say another prayer.  Prayers of hope for the Krull and Erwin families.  Prayers of hope for all families battling cancer.  Prayers of thanks for those I know who have made it.  Prayers for the hearts of those who have lost. 

Today we ran almost 5 miles, as a healthy family.  I am going give thanks for that too.

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